Adopting Sofia

Hey all

2009-10-22T20:19:00.004-04:00

I realize it's been a while since I've posted ANYTHING! Maybe about a month... Well, Sofia has been home nearly two months. She is amazing in every way and we just can't get enough of her. All the kids have been adjusting very well and we are all exhausted! But that's good, right? I remember having trouble getting to sleep at night... Well, not anymore all I have to do is touch a pillow! LOL!

Here are a few pics of Sofia from recent days!

One Month

2009-09-24T12:34:00.001-04:00

One Month is how long Sofia has been home! ONE MONTH! How time flies! Chris and I were just talking last night about how some days we still can't believe she's home, while other days it's like she's always been here. It's a very strange feeling.

Anyway, hope you enjoy this pic of the day!

My Awesome Husband

2009-09-21T09:30:00.002-04:00

I wanted to post a little brag on my husband. He is always looking for ways to surprise me on holidays and birthdays but never seems to be successful or very good at it until now.

Today is my birthday... So, this past Saturday my husband told me he wanted to go to IKEA, just the two of us. This was strange to me because he hates shopping but I jumped at the chance to go. He said we should try the one in Brooklyn. I said, sounds great, lets go. So, we jumped in the car and drove to NYC except we didn't go to IKEA. We parked near times square and he rushed me to get where we needed to be. When we got there he said, "I got us tickets to see Phantom of the Opera!" I was WOWED to say the least! If anyone knows me, they know I'm a musical junkie so this was amazing! After the show I thought we would then be going to IKEA but NO! He had one more trick up his sleeve... He had made reservations at a really nice restaurant around the corner and we had a lovely dinner just the two of us. After that we did go to IKEA!

What a day!

This man fills my heart in so many ways! I love him like crazy! The best husband out there!

Our foster Children

2009-09-17T23:16:00.002-04:00

I haven't really spoken of my two foster children on this blog as of yet. We were waiting to reveal our foster status to the world until after Sofia came home. Not to mention, this blog is really dedicated to her.

Anyway...
Chris and I had discussed becoming foster parents for several years before we decided to test the waters of the system last November. I remember being really nervous when making the first contact and expecting to be rejected because we were in the process of an international adoption. They did question us a lot about adopting Sofia and what our long term desires were. After several phone calls they said they thought it would work and we could start the process. We didn't hear from anyone again until February when we had our first home visit. Then in March we started training... April, I met one on one with the SW and had our second home visit. Tuesday, May 12, 2009 Chris met one on one and we had our final home visit. We were assured things would go smoothly and that we would notified when we were approved.

The following day I got a phone call from our SW. I thought there was going to be a problem with our paperwork because nothing seems to come too easily. However, she said, "don't worry, everything is fine. You are an approved foster home!" I was thrilled to say the least. She added that she had some news for us: A possible placement! I was dumbfounded. She said it was a boy, age 2 1/2 and a girl, age 11 months. They're siblings and part hispanic.

We were very excited and surprised! There were currently in a foster home that could no longer keep them and their SW wanted to place in a home that may be interested in adopting them. We struggled and prayed about the decision. We had reasons for saying yes and reasons for saying no. After receiving WISE counsel from several friends the conviction was placed on us to say yes because there are no accidents and if we were being asked God had a plan. How could be say no after hearing that?

Two weeks later, on May 28 they moved in! We were elated and worried if we could handle it. Needless to say they are still here and we are thrilled to have them. THey are a challenge and a blessing.

Our hope is to begin the adoption process in February or sooner. The BP are not following through with what the court has ordered of them and haven't been since they were placed in January.

It is difficult to make sense of my feelings about the situation... On one hand, I don't want the BP to get it together because I want these to stay with us... On the other hand, I really DO want them to get it together because I know they love their kids. (it's an unhealthy love but it is love). It's definitely hard to reconcile in my own heart. I do know this....

God is the planner, not me or the Social Workers or the Judges or anyone else. If His plan is for us to adopt these kids then we will... If not, then we will learn how to mourn the loss of them.

I love these kids very much and I am sure that my heart will be broken if they leave. But I know God has chosen our family for something bigger than I ever thought possible. I have, many times, sat back and wondered how we got to this place. I never wanted a house full of kids. I never wanted to be a stay at home Mom. I never wanted to be a home school junkie. And I definitely had no desire to adopt or take care of other peoples kids. I wanted 2 kids... I wanted to work as a musician... And I wanted a break from kids during school hours. God has turned my life upside down. And I like it. No I LOVE it. Don't get me wrong, I still have a dream of working as musician. I still mourn the loss of singing my heart on stage but... I want a house full of kids and I want to be home with them, teaching them...

There's no better life than the one God has given me. There's no better husband than my Chris, no better daughters than Renee and Sofia.

There's just No Better Life than the one I have. I have done nothing to deserve the blessings I have!

Thank you Jesus!!!!!!

P.S.
Please enjoy this little video of our sweet Sofia!

Sofia a tutu and Tea Party!

2009-09-17T11:19:00.000-04:00

This is my sweet Sofia having a fantabulous time this morning! She loves the Tutu I made and has been wearing for several days! I just love watching her play and have such a wonderful time. We are cherishing every moment with her.

WOW!! What a Whirlwind

2009-09-12T22:35:00.002-04:00

When we left to pick up Sofia, August 21, I knew things would be hectic for a little while but I have to say things have been down right insane.

We came home with Sofia August 24...travelled to Seymour IN, August 27, to visit family! They threw a HUGE party on the 29th and we then travelled to Terre Haute, IN on the 30th... We finally came home Labor day!!!

We are totally exhausted. But with all the exhaustion I am constantly looking at my family and saying, "I can't believe what has happened."

For those reading this blog that do not know Chris have been foster parents to two amazing kids since the end of May and are looking forward to the possibility of adopting in the near future... So, as I think about being parents to FOUR children I am utterly surprised that we have what it takes to simply keep up.

I won't write much more.... I will say that I have 2 of the most beautful daughters on the planet!

Enjoy!

Laura

Pics of my sweet Sofia!

2009-08-25T21:48:00.001-04:00

Enjoy!

P.S. I did her hair today for the first time!

HOME

2009-08-25T07:54:00.002-04:00

We got home late last night! It has been an amazing ride! Sofia truly is our little Haitian Queen. She was perfect on the flights and as sweet as she should could be when we got home.

I'll post more with pics later, just wanted to give a little update!

I'm giddy!!!

We're here

2009-08-22T20:20:00.004-04:00

We landed yesterday afternoon and it's been a blast! We have church tomorrow with her birth parents and home on monday!!! Sofia is perfect!!!!!!! I can't believe we will be home with her monday!

Love to All

Laura

I'm Leavin' On a Jet Plane

2009-08-21T02:50:00.002-04:00

Well, I woke up at 2:30 this morning.... We are leaving for the airport at 4. I haven't really slept at all due to the intense excitement!

I can't wait to hold Sofia and know she's coming home to stay. I'm praying our flights are all on time (we only have 30 minute layover in Miami) and we arrive safely in PAP. I'm also praying that this weekend goes quickly so we can be home again with our whole family!

Please pray with me as we FINALLY end this part of our adoption adventure!

Laura

Travelling

2009-08-18T09:27:00.002-04:00

Our travel date has been set for this friday. We are extremely excited byond words. We are so thankful.

I have been "nesting" since last week and can't seem to find enough to do around the house. We have been packed for a week and the house is almost entirely clean.

It's really strange to think that this time next week our baby girl will finally be home with us. We have been dreaming about this day for so long.

Please pray for Sofia that her adjustment will be easy on her. Please pray for safe travels and a good time while in Haiti!

Thanks in advance for all your prayers!

VISA APPOINTMENT!!!

2009-08-14T16:22:00.001-04:00

Visa will be done Monday!

we have our Visa Appointment!!!!

2009-08-11T14:19:00.001-04:00

Hey all-

We have our visa appointment this Friday the 14th!!!!

We are praying to travel next Friday!!! It's unreal how close we are!

Just a quick post to say...

2009-08-10T11:47:00.001-04:00

We have I-600 approval and are just waiting for the VISA!!!!! We're pumped... the bags are packed and we're ready to go!

New dress

2009-07-29T08:43:00.003-04:00

Hey there

I realize I haven't posted in a while. We have been very busy here in the O'Neal house.

So, here's a quick update on Sofia:

She's doing well and should be home in just a few short weeks. Her dossier was submitted to the Embassy some time last week. So... We are just waiting for the news that we can begin the "birthing" process, so to speak. I'm ready to push!!!! LOL

I'd like to solicit your prayers at this moment. Please pray that we are able to get the visa with no porblems and that we can receive the "call" soon. Also, please pray that we can find flights that are reasonable. We're praying for a non stop flight from PAP to JFK. They are out there it's just hard to find at the last minute. Thanks in advance for your prayers!

While we wait these last few, long, weeks I made Sofia a new dress.

Take a look and tell me what you think. I love yellow on her, beautiful, skin. I did use a store bought pattern for this(I usually don't) but I managed to tweak it a bit and line it fully and add the little flowered fabric at the bottom as well as the buttons. I can't wait to see how it looks on her.

TTYL

Laura

I Need Thee, Oh I Need Thee

2009-07-08T11:16:00.002-04:00

All who know me well, know that I am not a fan of traditional church hymns... I know, I know... for me it's a matter of what meets my spiritual needs and in MOST(not all) cases hymns don't meet me there. I grew up on hymns and love the memories I have of singing them until my voice wore out. But as I've grown older my needs have changed and hymns have more sentamentality than true meaning for me...

I say all this to say...

There is a song that has been burnt on my heart for the past several weeks and it's a song that's just the opposite of what I thought my heart would be singing...

I need thee every hour, most gracious Lord;
no tender voice like thine can peace afford.

Refrain:
I need thee, O I need thee;
Every hour I need thee;
O bless me now, my Savior, I come to thee.

I need thee every hour; stay thou nearby;
temptations lose their power when thou art nigh.
(Refrain)

I need thee every hour, in joy or pain;
come quickly and abide, or life is vain.
(Refrain)

I need thee every hour; teach me thy will;
and thy rich promises in me fulfill.
(Refrain)

I need thee every hour, most Holy One;
O make me thine indeed, thou blessed Son.
(Refrain)

How amazing are these words? They are trued EVERYDAY!

Lord, I need you more than I even know! I need you in ALL things. Take my life and let it be consecrated, Lord to thee.

The Last Leg of the Wait...

2009-07-02T09:19:00.002-04:00

I wanted to take a moment to post a quote from an email from last week. It's from a dear friend of mine (that I haven't even met in person).

"I have to say that if we can endure on our own strength then we wouldn't need Jesus. You can do this you are more than a conqueror. Hang in there and hang onto your faith! The facts are different than God's truth speak God's truth over your situation. God works all things out for our good. Trust in Him He loves you. The Bible says that if we have the faith of a mustard seed we can tell the mountain to move and it must move. So then tell your mountain to move! Tell whatever it that is keeping you from getting your baby before the director leaves to move. Stand boldly before the Throne of God and proclaim the things you are believing God for. You can do this! You can do all things through Christ who strengthens you! I am hoping that I am not being to forward and that what I have said didn't hurt you in any way or offended you. That is not my heart but rather to stir the waters and to stir up something inside of you! Stand up and be bold you are a child of the King and He has given you His authority here on earth. Call those things that are not as though they are! That is the evidence of faith! I know what it is to be tired and I also know what it is to have a friend that will carry you to the feet of Jesus and that is what I hope that my words have done for you."

I have been reading and rereading her words as well as pouring the Words of God into me heart.

Deuteronomy 31:6 (New Living Translation)

6 So be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the Lord your God will personally go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor abandon you.”

Philippians 1:6 (New Living Translation)

6 And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.

Romans 8:38 (New Living Translation)

38 And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,[a] neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love.

Merci Jezi

Hope you enjoy this pic from the first time we met Sofia in May 2007. Let's pray her home!

Prayer

2009-06-16T08:29:00.002-04:00

Heavenly Father,

I praise you and thank you for the many blessings You have given to me. I know I am unworthy and undeserving of your grace, yet, You, so lavishly, pour it upon me daily. Your, ever present, hand can be seen all throughout my life. You have brought me up from darkness and set my feet on Your higher ground more times than I can count. You are always with me; guiding and disciplining. My gratitude will never be enough to fully thank and give You the glory You deserve. All I can give is: Me. Today, I am Yours. All of me. I surrender to your will.

Lord, bless my, dear, husband. He loves You more than anything and desires to be a man after Your heart. I pray that You'll show him Your power today. Bless him.

Father, be with my children. Show them who You are and how they desperately need You.

Savior, bless our adoption. We know Your time is the right time and I pray for Your peace during the rest of the wait. I cannot thank You enough for dear Sofia. I know there is nothing good in me that I should deserve such a blessing but You have chosen to bless anyway. I pray that You will bring her home to us.

Thank You for saving me, loving me and NEVER letting me go.

Amen

What a beautiful day! And adoption news!

2009-06-07T13:48:00.005-04:00

My goodness this day could not be more beautiful. The sun is FINALLY out and the temp is perfect. We don't have air conditioning and on a day like today we don't need it!!

I know I haven't been very faithful in posting lately but God has been working in our lives lately. I can't go into detail right now but hope to be able to shortly.

Chris and I called the orphanage yesterday afternoon to talk to Sofia and see about an update! Well, great news... The orphanage director says it's just a matter of weeks before Sofia comes home! We will find out more specifics around June 23.

Our hearts have really been aching for Sofia lately and she NEVER leaves our thoughts. We're praying that all will go well and she will be home with us before her 3rd birthday, July 25.

God is showing me more and more how He ALWAYS finishes what He starts! He will see this through to the end!

Keep praying,

Laura

P.S. here's a pic of my lovely girl! She puts me in tears every time I look at her!

What do you think?

2009-05-25T20:01:00.003-04:00

Hey all

Wanted to post some pics of the boys clothes I made this weekend. I was able to use a dress shirt and a T-shirt that Chris never wears to make these cute little outfits. Let me know what you think.

Thanks

A Great Day

2009-05-19T13:20:00.003-04:00

Without going into great detail things have been interesting around here. It has become more than clear to me that God is working in our lives in ways I've not seen before.

Something left us disheartened and kicking against God Sunday... I knew there was work going on but wanted my own way/picture. I had no idea God would work on me so heavily through the night, while I slept, and not stop all through Monday.

I love how God uses people who love and care us to intervene when He could just, simply, put the "Wammy" on us. We didn't think we could do it but God put people in our paths to encourage and give GODLY counsel. There's nothing like it.

Thank you Lord for your tender guidance and love. Your ways truly are higher and better than my own. I am underserving of the love You show and I am humbled by your generous hand of blessings.

Amen and Amen!!!

Halleujah!

My Mother's Day!

2009-05-10T23:10:00.003-04:00

Today has been a great day. Nothing special happened but church was amazing and my sweet family got me a couple GREAT gifts. Thanks to the sweetness of my husband and Renee I got a beautiful skirt from Lane Bryant and a brand new SEWING MACHINE! It is super awesome.

Needless to say, I've been sewing all day! I worked on a patchwork quilt that I started before my old machine died last year. It's going to be very cute. I also made a dress. I am attaching pics of the dress because I need your help.

I need to know whether or not you think I should add things like this to me Etsy Shop. I need input so I figured this was the best place to go! Let me know exactly what you think. I can take it so let me have it! ;-)

Thanks
Laura

The struggle.

2009-05-08T12:10:00.001-04:00

I'm struggling today.
That's all.

AVOIDANCE!

2009-04-20T14:29:00.002-04:00

According to dictionary.net the word AVOID is defined "To quit or evacuate; to withdraw from." I have to say that's exactly what I have been doing. I have been avoiding my blog and the blogs of others.

Why, you ask? Well, it's simple...

I'm tying not to think about ADOPTION! Every time I read about other family's and their adoption adventures I wonder if I'm the only one feeling empty.

While I was in Haiti a few weeks back I was reminded CONSTANTLY of how empty I feel without Sofia! I got the privilege to see two families, that I know personally, arrived in Haiti to take home their children. While I was ecstatic for them; truly Happy and thrilled for them, I had an extremely difficult coming to terms with, "Why NOT me?". At least on of the families was around all but one day of my trip. I can't tell you how hard it was to see the joy in their eyes and hear the excitement in their voices. I was torn.

I wanted to be, visibly, happy for them but each time I allowed myself to forget that Sofia wasn't coming home with me I immediately stopped my joy for them. I recognized how selfish I was being and wanted to be selfless. I don't know why, I just couldn't.

I know all the right ways to think... They ways God would have had me respond. I did try. I don't know if these families knew how broken I was. There was one moment when I had no control and just started to cry. They were so sweet to me but they knew they couldn't console me and they didn't try. I really appreciated that. They understood. That was important to me.

I hate knowing I'm being selfish and not able/willing to stop. It's difficult not to be selfish in these situations. Many of us, adoptive parents, decided to adopt because WE wanted to grow our families. I WANTED... WE WANTED. For us it was selfish; not that we haven't felt God's hand in the entire process. We know He is who's making this happen. But still, we wanted to adopt for US!

I find myself jealous and envious of anyone who is farther along than me and wondering, "what's wrong with me? Do I not deserve Sofia?" And you know, the correct response is there is nothing good in me and I don't deserve her. If Sofia comes home it won't be because I did anything to deserve her. It will be because God chose to give her to us for whatever reason.

I don't say any of this to indicate my trip was bad. It was AMAZING! It was just hard!

So, in closing, I'm sorry for my AVOIDANCE! I guess I'm just trying to work things out in my own heart.

Lord,

I need you!

TTYL,
Laura

Back From Haiti

2009-04-10T20:17:00.002-04:00

Hey All-

I have been back from Haiti since Wednesday. I had a great trip! Sofia is as beautiful as ever. I can't believe how much I fall in love with her each time I see her. She is such a sweetie. If you'd like to check out the pics I took you can go to the following link: http://adoptingsofia.shutterfly.com/ Hope you enjoy!

Also thought you would like to see a little video I took of Sofia the second day there. She's too cute for words!

Enjoy!

Saturday In Haiti - WARNING a little gross

2009-04-04T16:38:00.004-04:00

Bonjour

I wanted to stop in to tell a quick story about my sweet Sofia!

We went site seeing today and things were going well. We decided to stop at the Baptist Mission for lunch. I ordered pizza for Sofia and a sandwich for myself. When the pizza came Rachel (the Orphanage director) and I noticed that Sofia would NOT eat anything. After a few minutes Rachel says to me, "I think she needs to be changed, she stinks." So I got her out of the highchair and noticed immediately that POO was on the highchair and her dress. "OH NO", I said. I walked her to the bathroom and the attendant pointed us to a table and as soon as I laid her down the attendant said, "OOOOOOHHHHH!" I Iaughed and changed her clothes and cleaned her all up. As we were walking back to the table later I noticed that there was Poo even on the floor that had fallen of her leg. I know, Gross right! As I sat with her on my lap and knew she wasn't feeling well I thought about how long it had been since I had to clean up that kind of mess. I realized again how much I love being a mommy(even when it's gross)!

Thanks heavens for my sweet baby girl!

Have a good Day

I'm here

2009-04-02T09:12:00.003-04:00

I spent my first day with Sofia yesterday... she's even more beautiful than last time!!! I will try to upload some pics as soon as I can. The best thing was when she saw me yesterday morning she smiled and came right to me. She loves the picture book I made her and the baby doll I brought!!!!

I'll post more later!!!

time for breakfast and a bath!!!!

Laura

P.S. Sorry the pic is on its side!

Going to Haiti Wednesday!

2009-03-30T09:34:00.003-04:00

Well, I have to say I'm getting very excited about my trip this week. It's been an entire year since I've seen my sweet baby and I am fervently praying for God's miracles.

I would also like to ask all that are reading this if they would be so kind as to pray for my journey this week. Traveling always makes me nervous but traveling to Haiti even more so.

We will be leaving the house around 2 a.m Wednesday morning to arrive in Philly around 4 am. My flight leaves at 6:15 and I arrive in Haiti at 11:10. Please pray for an uneventful trip!

Also, pray for my husband as he will be driving me and then will be going straight to work with basically no sleep at all.

I will be posting daily and will hopefully be able able to post pics if the internet allows.

My bags are packed and I'm ready to go...

We're so close to bringin her home I can taste it!

2009-03-19T11:02:00.002-04:00

Well, here's what I think I know! We received an email a couple days ago stating that we are in the process of getting Sofia's passport! We're still waiting on confirmation but this means we are super close! My excitement is almost uncontainable.

Our process for getting Sofia's visa may take a little longer than normal due to the fact that we haven't filed the I-600 yet. It's a long story and I have been trying to get it done months but I have just now been given the ok to travel April 1 for filing it.

We're praying God will intervene on our behalf and make things go quickly and smoothly.

So, well see! At least I know where things are and that she could be home soon.

I have an extra spring in my step!

Praise Jesus!

Laura

Visiting Haiti!

2009-03-10T08:06:00.003-04:00

The flight has been booked and it I'll be in Haiti April 1-April 7 to file the I-600! I've been waiting since December to get this done so I'm real excited. I'm hoping to get some confirmation as to where our paperwork is while I'm there. Hopefully it's farther along than we think.

I just can't wait to see Sofia!

I'm sooooooo excited!

HUGE SALE at My Etsy Store

2009-03-09T10:45:00.002-04:00

Hey All-

I wanted to let everyone know that there is currently a HUGE SALE going on at my Etsy Shop! You should definitely check it out. There are savings of up to 50%!

Don't miss out on the Short Sale! You won't regret it!

Go To: laurashandmadehaven.etsy.com

thanks for your support

Laura

Pics

2009-03-02T07:45:00.003-05:00

Here are a couple new pics of Sofia we got yesterday! She LOVES ice cream!

I'm awaiting approval to travel in the next few weeks so be in prayer that all falls in line! I am need to file the I-600 and I haven't seen Sofia in about a year so I, desperately, need to go.

Enjoy!
Laura

Bragging on Renee

2009-02-25T09:43:00.002-05:00

Wanted to write a little post about my daughter, Renee, who is in the 10th grade...

I can't believe how smart and talented she is...

Around the beginning of January we found out that the online charter school she currently uses was having an "Inauguration Day essay contest." I encouraged her to write for it since she always talks about wanting to be a journalist or just a writer of some sort. She worked tirelessly before the inauguration to decide how she wanted to "cover" the story. On Inauguration Day, while my sister and brother-in-law were in town she sat in front of the TV glued to, what she called, history in the making!

She decided to write her essay from a "Racial Equality" perspective. Renee is half African American, so I have always wanted to her to be able to identify with that part of her heritage even though her parents are white and we live in a very white dominated area. Having said that, I wasn't sure how well she would relate to the "racial" aspect of the whole thing. She hasn't really dealt with discrimination personally. She's read books and watched movies and such but that's about it. She did say (and I had noticed) that she feels and sees A LOT of stares when we go places here in North East PA. It's as if many people have never seen a multi-racial person before. She has also experience extreme rudeness while shopping and such. For example, we have gone shopping several times and she has gone to her part of the store and I to mine. when I go to find her she is either browsing or getting ready to try something on. More often then not as I approach her I notice the employees either ignoring her or being rude. When they realize that I'm her mother the attitudes quickly vanish. It's interesting to me. She's very good brushing all that aside. She did, however, while living in Indiana, get accused of shoplifting from a Dollar General. of course, I wasn't there at the time and they even called the police on her. Which, by the way, is illegal if they do not WITNESS the theft and see the person walk out of the store with it. Chris and I went to this store immediately only to be told that Renee had a big purse and so she was suspicious. Interestingly enough, she was with 2 other white females (my sisters) but Renee was the main one accused. This got very ugly. we were furious. My daughter was unlawlfully searched by law enforcement and humiliated.

OKAY... I say all that to say... Renee is AWESOME! Smart...Sweet... Talented... Beautiful... you name it she's got it. She entered the contest and of the 200 or so high school entries she placed 2nd!

She has been sky high since. She wrote what she felt in a very knowledgeable way and has been rewarded for it. I think this is a confirmation that writing is her thing and now she REALLY knows it.

BTW, she decided she wants to start volunteering... She starts(small) at the library today. She made phone calls to dozens of places to find the right place and didn't ask me for help once...other than to drive her, she's only 15. her motivation astounds me. I can barely get motivated to take a shower most days ;)

Any way, that's my girl! I'm super proud of her. I will try to get my hands on her essay and post it soon.

I just love her

TTYL,
Laura

Good News?

2009-02-12T08:47:00.002-05:00

Well, it looks like we're in Archives...Our update was a little vague but it did say that things were moving for us and that our paperwork is getting stamps. So, we'll see. I think it's cause for my heart to celebrate a little.

Laura

Apparently, I Need to Post

2009-02-09T20:25:00.002-05:00

I was informed by a friend(I won't tell her name but her initials are A.M.Y ;D) that I need to post something. Apparently, she thinks I need to get something a little more positive out there.... So, here it goes....

Do you ever just KNOW God is working?

There have been several things I have been praying for lately and although not all have been answered God is definitely working.
Without going in to all the details I can say that God has provided ABUNDANTLY for our family and I couldn't feel more blessed.

Praise God!

P.S. I love you AMY!!!

Stinking Car Battery

2009-01-26T09:57:00.002-05:00

Well, my husband and I are super annoyed this morning. Last week we had some problems with the battery on our 1992 Chevy S-10. No big deal, right? Not at all, other than the fact that we only have the truck we really have to think creatively to get it done. Luckily, we had a rental car since my sister ad her husband were visiting. So, he jumped the truck, drove it to Walmart and bought a new battery! Problem Solved.... Not really! It's been really cold here and it's an old truck so sometimes it struggles to start. This morning... AGAIN... wouldn't start. It was 2 degrees outside and Chris was troubleshooting. Mind you, he has no experience with cars just a lot of experience googling about cars! He cleaned the connector thingys and still, nothing.

As I watched him from our office window I decided to do the googling myself. I found out that even though you buy a BRAND NEW battery it still may not be charged. We believe this is the case for us. $72 for a battery that still gives us the same issues as the old. All this would be okay if we knew anyone who could come jump the truck, Chris could, again, go to Walmart and have it charged and be off to work in no time. However, we've lived here nearly 6 months and have met NO ONE! One of the things that really frustrated me this morning was the neighbor to our right brought his trash to the curb this morning and saw Chris trying to start the truck but said nothing. Another neighbor was returning from somewhere is his big, fancy truck and initially it looked like was going to roll down his window to talk to Chris but instead came to a complete stop just to back himself into his driveway!

SO, here we sit... Chris at his computer and I at mine with nothing that can be done! He's on the phone now with one of his employees hoping she can come and pick him up. He'll than take the battery with him, charge it at work, find a way to come back later, install the battery and pray for a miracle. I think he may try to jump the truck when she gets here to see how it works!

All of this would be so much easier if we just had another car!

I'm frustrated with people right now and their lack of care for the people around them. This frustration is compounded by the fact that we haven't found a church here yet, Christians, in general, aren't caring about those around them, and this adoption process.

I know this all sounds very harsh but let me explain a bit... We've visited several churches in the area since September. We have found one that is ok, but not great. We can deal with O.K. but there us something to be said about feeling welcome in a church. No one speaks to us or even notices that we're visitors. We did attend on a Wednesday night and the pastor was VERY nice. There were only about 25 or 30 people in attendance so you would think people would be more apt to, at the very least, say hello. But alas, not a single word from ANYONE! Renee went to the youth group and said it was OK but didn't know if she would fit in. So that's my frustration with Church Searching!

As far as Christians are concerned? Here's my deal... I'm a former Pastor's daughter... My Dad threw himself in to ministry when I was very young. Things seemed alright at first, but again, I was a kid. As my Dad moved from tiny church to tiny church I fit in less and less. I was mentally abused by the kids and ignored by adults. My parents, eventually, divorced and that was that. My Dad did get back into ministry but was, terribly, unsuccessful. I thought, for a long time, that the music ministry was where I was "called" to be. But now, who knows. After my Dad was FORCED out of the ministry by the Co-pastor of the church he built things got even worse. I, finally, began to realize what church(the one's I experienced) was all about. It was about doing what you're told and bowing down to the families that have more money and power than you do. It wasn't about compassion for the lost, love for your neighbor or the message of Jesus. It was about control. The older women wanted to control all the younger women and teens. The men, well, they wanted to dictate to ALL! The only time there was "compassion" was when there was a show to be put on or new member to the clique. This has been my church life for years and years. Crazy enough, we have continued to attend church because it's the right thing to do all the while things never changing. We're still the young ones who need to be controlled. I'm still the 31 year old with a half black 15 year old. I'm still the one with Dad who, blatantly, walked away from what was right to submit to a wife who cares nothing for anything but herself. I'm still the little girl whose family was broken like so many others but none of the "christians" would intercede to help.
These things never change. This adoption process has served to remind of that.

Life has served to remind me that we, people, really are wicked and shameful. Quick story... Chris and I rarely go on dates. In fact, since we moved here in September we've only been on two dates. Anyway, Chris decided to take me on a date Saturday. We went to see Slumdog Millionare, which was awesome, and went to dinner at a really nice restaurant at the casino ( we don't gamble so it was a little weird). Anyway, we're in line waiting for a table, when we hear a woman talking to the man she was with. Initially, she was just very mean and spiteful to the man but he just took it. Then she started complaining about politics. This, I know, is not unusual especially in this day and age. But, she never talked about politics, itself, just Barack Obama being "colored" and how he should be "shot"! Chris and I were mortified! We don't agree with his politics but we think it's amazing that and african american family is living in the white house. This woman continued to go on and on about what she called "coloreds". I was on the edge of losing my mind when she exclaimed, "If I were president I would sterilize them all! All they ( you know coloreds) wanted to do is have babies and be on Welfare. Sterilize 'em!" We couldn't believe what we were hearing! What terrible things to say about other HUMAN BEINGS! It's sick! Chris looked at me and said, "Sometimes I just HATE being white." We just can't get away from the hatefulness and the filth. I have never felt a stronger urge to punch someone in that face like I did that night.

I feel ashamed to be so many things. I'm ashamed to call my self a christian. I'm ashamed to be white. I'm ashamed to be a woman. I'm ashamed because I'm fat. I'm ashamed that my house isn't clean enough. I'm ashamed of not being the best wife I can be or friend I can or daughter I can be or sister. I guess in the end, I'm ashamed of being human. How do you reconcile that other than with the blood of Jesus Christ!

I know what you're thinking, "All this because f a Dead Car Battery?" I don't know...

I don't mean to be a downer, but this weekend has brought many things to light! Don't be discouraged by me... I'm just trying to figure the stuff out!

BTW, sorry this is so long!

I haven't posted in a while

2009-01-23T17:19:00.002-05:00

Hey all-

Well, my sister and her husband left this past Wednesday. We were very sad to see them go but we had an AWESOME time!

I wanted to let everyone know that I added a few new things to my etsy. Check it out!

laurashandmadehaven.etsy.com

TTYL

Laura

My Sister is Coming to Visit

2009-01-14T15:10:00.002-05:00

We moved here from Indiana almost 5 months ago and haven't been back to visit yet. so I haven't seen my sis, Betsy, since the morning we left. I miss her soooooo much and she's going to be here TOMORROW!! I'm real excited!

Off to clean the house more!

TTYL,

Laura

My New Etsy Shop

2009-01-10T19:01:00.002-05:00

A Huge thanks goes out to Christina for suggesting I get an Etsy shop! I have a few handmade things that I posted so I hope everyone will take a look at them. I hope to make some more things and post them!

I'm so excited!!!!

Thanks Christina!

Laura

Etsy: Your place to buy & sell all things handmade
LaurasHandmadeHaven.etsy.com

Renee

2009-01-08T08:41:00.004-05:00

Many of you may not know that I have a 15 year old daughter. I don't talk about her very often on this blog as it has been very dedicated to the adoption. I wanted to take time today to express how proud I am to be her mother. I couldn't ask for a better kid.

I gave birth to Renee when I was 16 years old. I was a single mother until she was nine. I went to school and college and worked full time until I got marrried five years ago. I had high hopes for her but never thought she would be as great as she is now.

She's smart, funny, witty, thoughtful, stylish (aka...a fashion diva), and beautiful. And above all, loves Jesus.

I'm not sure she'll ever know how much I love her and how proud of her I am.

I also don't think she'll ever know how lucky she is.

When she was very little I prayed endlessly for a daddy for her. I knew parenting was not designed to be done alone and every little girl needs her Daddy. She has no idea how much I prayed and longed for that part of her life to be full.

Interestingly enough, the Daddy I had prayed for had been in our lives all along. He was at the hospital the night she was born and fell in love with her the first time he saw her.

I never thought I'd be married to Chris... We've known each other since Junior high! God has crafted this family and I wouldn't have it any other way.

No one is luckier than I.

I love you, Renee. You'll never how proud I am of you.

Mom

Prayers

2009-01-06T09:16:00.002-05:00

Hey all,

I wanted to take a minute and ask for your prayers... As we are waiting for Sofia to come home we are desperately trying to save/raise money to finish the journey. However, we are struggling to make everything work. I'm sure all of you know the difficulties of saving money for something that seems to never have a financial end. I say all this to ask for your prayers for our adoption fund.

We are also in need of a car/minivan... Currently we have Chris' 1992 Chevy S-10. It's a decent vehicle and it works for us. Unfortunately, it is in no condition to drive long distances and it won't be suitable when Sofia comes home as it is very small.
We have been in PA for nearly 4 months now... It's been fun and hard at the same time and because the truck isn't that great we haven't been able to drive the 14 hours to indiana to visit family yet. It's been difficult not seeing family and friends.

Long story short, please pray for God's provision as we wait to see where He's leading.

TTYL,

Laura

Beautiful Christmas pics

2009-01-05T11:03:00.005-05:00

I got a couple pics from the orphanage today!

Check 'em out!

I can't believe how different she looks since the last time I was with her. It's difficult not being sad. But I do love looking at her pics. She's just lovely. Enjoy!

Laura

Happy New Year!

2008-12-31T23:57:00.003-05:00

I know there aren't many people who read this but I wanted to wish everyone a very Happy New Year!!! May 2009 see all our babies home!

A New Day!

2008-12-31T08:22:00.006-05:00

It's a beautiful morning in Northeast PA. Snow is falling and it's been quiet. I enjoy the silence of my mornings but long to hear the murmuring of a little girl in the background.

I read a blog post today that talked about the "wait". The post talked about an excerpt from Beth Moore's, "Get Out of That Pit". I'm paraphrasing, but, it basically spoke of how God used to do things in an instant... like creation... but once man came along things seemed to change. We wait... The book suggested that maybe our waiting has purpose. The purpose being, "togetherness" with God. Interesting to me was that my goal is "togetherness" with Sofia and God's goal is "togetherness" with Him... Same goal, different thought process.

I keep thinking I've got to hurry and get through this to be a mom again and start to complete this family. The end has to come soon. I wonder, is God thinking, "Laura, you've got to wait for my timing. You have to go through this to experience more of me. Look to me for your comfort, for guidance, for love, for completeness."

Maybe I'm missing the boat here! I don't know where I'm looking anymore. I thought I was looking in the right direction but that's not true. I've been looking to people to change the circumstance for this adoption. I have been so frustrated with the process and people involved with the process that I have solely focused on those people and how I feel wronged by them.

How many times have I asked the question: "Who advocates for me? For Sofia? For the many families like mine waiting for their kids?" I ask those questions everyday! I find myself infuriated when my answer is, "NO ONE advocates for me or Sofia!" You know, that may be true. No human being advocates for me. BUT, there is One who does and He is bigger and more powerful than any human being. He ordains everything!

I will always be failed by people! My frustration and feeling of loss may be justified. But it doesn't matter what people do or say, my Savior controls all things. People can do what they want. People won't bring our kids home. God will! I have to rest in that. I have to rest in Him.

So, today, I dedicate myself to look to God for my comfort during this wait. I look to Him for advocacy! If God is for me, who can be against me.

Sofia is coming home!I'm just waiting for God to send her this way! Oh, what a glorious day it will be!

Love to you all,

Laura

Songs that inspire me and speak what my heart feels!

2008-12-30T12:51:00.005-05:00

I don't think I need to add anything!

Have a Great Day

Laura

Christmas is over!

2008-12-25T14:05:00.006-05:00

Well, another Christmas has come and gone! I have to say I've struggled this year. We really hoped that Sofia would be home by now. We are missing her now, more than ever. But as I sit and think about what it would have been like if she were here when we decorated the Tree, hung lights on the porch or played in the first snow of the season I imagine how much more amazing it will be in real life when she, truly, is here.

Our dossier has been in Haiti for 486 days and counting! Such a long wait! We saw some pics of her recently and she is getting so big. I often sit and wonder if she knows I'm her Mama and Chris is her Papa. Does she know she has a big sister waiting for her? Does she remember the many times we've visited her? Will she ever know how much we love and miss her?

When we first started the process in march of 2007 I found it somewhat effortless to be distracted and not have her on the forefront of my mind. Now, however, is a different story.

We were told she would be home some time in 2008. As the year comes to a close I wonder what the new year will hold. Sofia will be 3 in July. We have already missed too much, will we miss another birthday? Another milestone?

I know how undeserving I am of this child. There are so many more families more deserving of children. I am thinking of one family, in particular, who so deserve their family to be complete. I have found myself, lately, praying so desperately their girls will come home NOW! This family needs to be complete! And at the same time I am forever mourning the fact my child and so many others may spend another year in the arms of someone else, not knowing Mama and Papa!

Someone adopting from Haiti told me the other day that she feels like she is being punished. I quickly reassured her that she, most definitely, is NOT being punished but I knew I felt the same! When is the wait long enough? My friend and I can't conceive children on our own. When has suffering of our hearts and families been enough? Does there come a time when enough IS enough?

Too many times I hear, "this will all be worth it in the end." I'm, honestly, sick of hearing it! I know it's worth it! It doesn't change the pain. It doesn't change the fact that there is NO ONE advocating on my behalf, on Sofia's behalf! And, in the end, I will still have missed Sofia's first steps, first words, potty training, kisses and hugs. And I still miss being called Mama. I want to hear her call Chris Papa! It may all be worth it, but time lost is time lost! I can't get it back. I can only stand to the side and know that all these things are happening without us. We have no documentation or way to remember that they've happened, we just know they are happening and someone else gets the joy of watching. We just have empty pages in the Baby Book.

Don't get me wrong, I know I'm not the first or the last to feel this pain. There are many in more pain than I.

I guess I just want to know when I'm standing in Sofia's room alone imagining what she will look like playing with her toys, wearing the same dress Renee wore and sleeping in her own bed if anyone hears my cry...

Laura

Please Pray

2008-12-19T10:40:00.003-05:00

Please be in prayer for the funding of our adoption. We found out that there is, yet, another unexpected expense. $500 for some translations. My heart is a little weary. The financial mountain just gets bigger and bigger.

Thank you
Laura

Great News!

2008-12-17T17:00:00.004-05:00

We got some great news over the weekend! We are finally out of Parquet! One step closer to bringing her home. We need to schedule a trip to Haiti for one of us to file our I-600. Only one problem, we still need to come up with the money. Please be in prayer for us that God would see fit to provide funds soon. If you feel compelled to give you can click on the "donate" link and give through paypal.

Also, PLEASE be in prayer for our friends who are also adopting from Haiti and are having a hard time.

Pray for the peace that passes ALL understanding.

Merry Christmas!

Laura

P.S. Enjoy the recent pic we got of Sofia "carrying" clothes on her head just like the merchants.

Sofia Scarves

2008-11-25T11:42:00.004-05:00

We're all looking for ways to cut corners this Christmas. Here's an easy way to get some unique, inexpensive Christmas presents, and help bring our little girl home at the same time. We're selling "Sofia Scarves"... hand-made scarves that are durable, adorable and extremely warm. Check out the picture to see what they look like.

As you all probably know, Laura and I are in the process of adopting Sofia from Rivers of Hope Orphanage in Petionville, Haiti. Our paperwork has been in the process for nearly a year and a half. We met Sofia almost 2 years ago and knew immediately she was our daughter. God has blessed us with the funds to be able to continue the adoption thus far. You can watch our story on the post below.

However, with our recent move to Pennsylvania which included the loss of my income and many unexpected adoption expenses on the Haiti side we are finding ourselves in need of approximately $7000 more. Our hearts desire is bring our sweet Sofia home some time in 2009. Our prayer is that God will again bless us with the funds we need to bring her home.

If you are interested in helping here are some things you can do:

Place an order for a Sofia Scarf and then tell everyone you know to place an order as well. Sofia Scarves are $15 a piece, or $25 for two. We also ask $5 S&H for every two scarves you purchase.
If you can't order a scarf consider making a donation for Sofia. Anything we raise above what we need will be donated directly to Rivers of Hope Orphanage for the care of the other orphaned children.
If you are not in a position to order a scarf or donate please PRAY for us as we know God has ordained this journey for us and He will see it to the end.

Sofia scarves are handmade at our dining room table. Payments can be made through our paypal, money order or personal check. We've included a donate link below. Just be sure to let us know your order, including colors. When funds clear the bank the scarf will be shipped.

They are fleece Scarves consisiting of two complimentary colors seamed together on each side with another color and a fleece flower if desired.

Choose 4 colors for your scarf - Main - Back - Seam - Flower

Black / gray / white / cream / pink / purple / light blue / dark blue / brown / green / orange / yellow / fuchsia

Praying Sofia Home,

Chris, Laura and Renee O'Neal

tvchris@gmail.com
812-239-0590
957 English St.
West Wyoming, PA 18644

Adopting Sofia Part 1 and 2

2008-11-24T12:28:00.001-05:00

This was shot in May of 2007. Sofia is now 2 and a half years old.

HMMMMM

2008-11-24T11:16:00.003-05:00

As you all know, we moved to PA in September. Because of the move and the fact that home studies expire after a year we needed to get an update. I have spent hours online searching for someone to do our update to no avail. I was beginning to get frustrated after living here 2 months and not getting anywhere with it until recently. I sent out a batch of emails on night to possible agencies and immediately got a response from one. So, to make a long story short.... I emailed PAhomestudy.com November 10 and Jessica was at our house November 15. Needless to say, we were thrilled. The timing was great. We just happened to have the money needed for the update and we've been off and running since then. We're just waiting on the clearances and then that part should be done. THANK GOD!

Things left to do:

1.File I-824 in Philly with a $340 fee
2.Get an extension on our I-600A
3.Get new fingerprints done
4.File I-600 in Haiti
5.WAIT WAIT WAIT!
6.There are more things to do, but let's just start here.

Money left to raise
$3500 - Orphanage/Agency fee
$ 340 - I-824 fee
$1500 - trip to Haiti to file I-600 (this is an estimate)
$1500 - trip to Haiti to bring Sofia Home (this is an estimate)
I hope that's all!

As far as our process is concerned here's where we stand.

Received our first pic of Sofia March 2007
Committed to love her forever March 2007
Dossier to Haiti end of August 2007
Entered IBESR November 2007
Exited IBESR July 2008
Entered Parquet August? 2008
Parquet birthparent appointment September 17 2008 STILL HAS NOT BEEN DONE
2nd Legal:
File I-600:
DNA:
MOI:
Passports completed:
Visa Appointment;
HOME:

Obviously we are a little frustrated and hurt by the fact that the birth parent appointment has not been fulfilled as scheduled. We feel completely powerless, as all adoptive feel, in this situation. We just want out family together.

On a brighter note, we have sold 31 scarves and hope to sell more. So, if you're interested let me know.

Chris and I have been debating for a few years now about participating in foster care or Foster to Adopt. We talked with our social worker when we had our home study done and she was very encouraging. So, please be in prayer as we investigate whether or not this is a good fit for us. We're not sure why we feel God pulling us in this direction, at this time, but we're praying for some clear answers soon.

Sorry this is so long.
TTYL!

sofia Scarves

2008-11-18T09:45:00.004-05:00

Hello All,

I am sending this asking for your help. I have uploaded a flyer that
my husband made for Sofia Scarves. We are in the process of adopting
Sofia from Rivers of Hope Orphanage in Petionville, Haiti. Our
paperwork has been in the process for nearly a year and a half. We
met Sofia almost 2 years ago and knew immediately she was our
daughter. God has blessed us with the funds to be able to continue
the adoption thus far. However, with our recent move to Pennsylvania
which included the loss of my income and many unexpected adoption
expenses on the Haiti side we are finding ourselves in need of
approximately $7000 more. Our hearts desire is to bring our sweet
Sofia home some time in 2009. Our prayer is that God will again bless
us with the funds we need to bring her home.

If you are interested in helping here are some things you can do:

1. Place an order for a Sofia Scarf and then tell everyone you know
to place an order as well.
2. If you can't order a scarf consider making a donation for Sofia.
Anything we raise above what we need will be donated directly to
Rivers of Hope Orphanage for the care of the other orphaned children.
3. If you are not in a position to order a scarf or donate please
PRAY for us as we know God has ordained this journey for us and He
will see it to the end.

Sofia scarves are handmade at my dining room table. Payments can be
made through paypal, money order or personal check. When funds clear
the bank the scarf will be shipped.

They are fleece Scarves consisting of two complimentary colors seamed
together on each side with another color and a fleece flower if
desired.

Choose 2 colors for scarf - 1 for seam - 1 flower color

Black
gray
white
cream
pink
purple
light blue
dark blue
brown
green
orange
yellow
fuchsia

Let me know if you're interested. They are $15 each or 2 for $25 plus
all orders ship for $5. These make great gifts and are very thick and
warm. Feel free to email me with questions and orders.
I've also uploaded a family pic just waiting to add the real Sofia.

Praying Sofia Home,

Chris, Laura and Renee O'Neal
laurapk21@gmail.com

It's Been a LONG LONG Time

2008-08-28T22:27:00.002-04:00

Well, I had thought I wouldn't update much anymore but I have had several people tell me they wish that I would continue writing. SO.... Here I go again.

Adoption Updates:

Sadly, we still have no update on our paperwork. We have been in IBESR since Nov. 2007. We had hoped and prayed that we would be farther along than this but, alas, we are not.

Today I have found myself very depressed about the entire situation and wondering if this, like our fertility, will come to an end with no child in our arms. My heart is sad and aches to have Sofia home and in the arms of the family God has chosen for her.

Life Updates:

Surprise! We're moving to Scranton, PA!! Chris got a new job and we will be relocating on or around September 8. I know it's very soon and I am up to my eyeballs in boxes and junk! It's a hard move but an exciting adventure that I know will bring Chris, Renee, and myself closer together. Wish us luck!

BTW, Sofia turned 2 on July 25, 2008 :( we're missing so much of her!

TTYL,
Laura

This is it

2008-04-14T20:41:00.003-04:00

I can say my sadness is overwhelming. I just said goodbye for the final time to my Sofia. My heart is broken. I have to say that it wouldn't feel so bad if I knew I would be coming back soon. But because of the expense Chris, Renee and myself do not if we will be able to come back at all before the adoption is finalized. I hate to think how much she will change between now and the time we see her again. The pain of leaving my child is immeasurable.

The bittersweet part of the situation is that I am dying to go home to my family. It feels like an eternity since I have been with them and I am missing them more every day.

I don't have much else to say. I am attempting to upload pics from yesterday and today as I type this. Unfortunately, I was unable to go to wither Orphanage today as I had hoped to get final pics for everyone. I am sorry! www.picasaweb.google.com/laurapk21

Talk to you all soon

Laura

A More Detailed Post

2008-04-12T10:27:00.002-04:00

I realize I have been absent from really writing on this blog. I apologize for my lack of information. To be honest, there hasn't been much going on. But I'll try to remember the details:

Sunday April 6 - We went to church. Sofia got to go with me so my excited was pretty high. The week prior Sofia's birth mother wasn't at church so i was anxious to see if she would be there. As soon I we walked into the church she caught my eye. Her face was beaming and she was immediately out of her seat. I met her at the row she was seated in and gave Sofia to her. I had prayed that she wouldn't and she didn't. There was a slight crowd around my little Sofia as people were talking to her and kissing her. It was quite a scene. We eventually went back to our seat and the service began. There was lots of music and voices raised in song to celebrate what God had done in them. I understood very little but was overwhelmed sitting there listening to people sing about God in a way that I was almost jealous of. It's interesting to me that each time I attend this church i understand nothing but God brings me to a place of intense worship of who He is. I fought back tears for the duration of my time there. I knew God was working on me and I wanted to figure out what it was. A few minutes into the music it occurred to me what I needed to do. I needed to give Sofia to God. I needed to finally say, "Whatever You want for her, I want for her. She's belongs to You." I have taken ownership, to a certain extent, of Sofia and had forgotten that she didn't belong to me. She belongs to God and whatever His plans are for her I need to accept it. After all, His plans are better and His thoughts are higher than my own. So that morning I sat in silence begging God to take her and do whatever He wills. After, finally, doing what I know He wanted there was a peace in me that i hadn't had in a very long time. It had been pressed upon my heart that it didn't matter who thought they were in control of this adoption process, whether it be individuals or government or whoever, they aren't! God has the ultimate control of when Sofia comes home to us. I just need to accept it and continue to give it to Him daily. And that is what I intend to do.

Monday, April 7 - I ran a few errands with Rachel and then went to the Big Orphanage. Rachel had gotten some toys for the kids so we spent some time passing them out. If you've checked out the web album, you can see it was like Christmas morning. It was fun to watch them get so excited.

Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday April 8, 9, 10 and 11 - I grouped all these days together because they were basically all the same. Because of the rioting in the nearby areas I didn't leave the house. Sofia did come to me and we had a wonderful time together. We played a lot, laughed a lot and she ate a lot. That girl just can't get enough to eat. Each day I'm with her I notice that she just gets more beautiful. I just cant get enough of her.

Today- There is a small plan for the day but if you've ever been to Haiti you know that plans mean nothing. But the plan is to got the Orphanage and put the curtains up. So we'll see. I'm currently waiting on Rachel to pick me up.

Lastly, i have a request. I have no idea who is reading this blog so I would like to ask all that are reading to send a comment so I know who you are.

Have a great day and I hope to have more posted tonight with more pics!

finally uploaded

2008-04-11T19:29:00.000-04:00

Check my picasa album

www.picasaweb.google.com/laurapk21

Crazy Haiti

2008-04-11T12:57:00.002-04:00

The internet here has been so crazy lately I can barely get emails out. So, that means uploading pics and updating the blog have been out of the question. I have tried but have experienced no success.

I haven't been out of the house since Monday so obviously no orphanage pics. Due to the turmoil here in Haiti we;ve stayed inside most of the time. With staying inside, I have had the opportunity to finish the curtains! so exciting! i hope to get to the orphanage before I leave and get them all hung. i hope they will be cute.

The turmoil here in Haiti has made me think a lot about things. i have to say i feel guilty being able to eat and rest and not have to worry about taking care of my family. It's heartbreaking to see how poor these people are.

Anyway, that's all I have for today.

5 days until I'm home!

Saturday Sunday Monday

2008-04-08T14:46:00.002-04:00

again Sorry

Things have been busy and I have been working continually on the curtains. I do have pics from each day that are uploading now. So be sure to check on them. www.picasaweb,google.com/laurapk21

On to a more serious note:

There has been rioting here in Haiti over the cost of food. The gates of the palace have been torn down and people have been killed. The rioters are breaking care windows, and store-fronts, as well as burning tires, and chanting, "We're Hungry!" Today is the worst day. Please pray for this nation. The average person lives on less than 2 U.S. dollars per day. So, when they say they are hungry, they are!

A Nice Calm Day

2008-04-04T20:45:00.002-04:00

Today was relaxing! I took a break from the curtains and just spent time with Sofia at Beth and Willem's! We played a little bit, took a nap, played a little more, ate peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, went with Beth to get ice cream and ate a yummy. (oh yeah, and we played a little between everything.)

There is a medical team from Terre Haute here now and most of them met Sofia a year ago on their last trip. So, needless to say, they were all thrilled to see her. They were eager to tell me stories of how adorable she was then and how beautiful she is now. She was being so cute at dinner tonight! She knew that everyone was looking at her so she kept making funny faces at everyone. Everyone had to take pics of her and were so excited. Everyone was sad when she had to leave. I think I felt the most sadness tonight! Strange, huh?

I hope you like the pics from today! www.picasaweb.google.com/laurapk21

I leave you with the lyrics to a song that has been ringing in my heart all day today. I hope it impacts like it has me.

Because of Love
Natalie Grant

Because of love He left His home
Made this earth His home
He did it willingly for you and me

With Heaven left behind
He came to save all mankind
from sin and shame.

He could have walked away
But instead He chose to stay upon that tree
and take a crown of thorns for me

Because of love

Because of love He bore my pain
Shouldering the pain
Why did He choose to go
How could He love me so

Because of love he called to me
He said child I will set you free
You’ll have life abundantly
Because of love (because of love)

He gave unselfishly
Caused my blinded to eyes to see
It was you and me he had in mind
On the road to Calvary
I never known such a perfect love
I had fallen down but he picked me up
He rescued my soul
Now I want the world to know

Because of love he left the grave
Prepared for us a place
He’ll back again someday
And I will hear him say

Because you believed
You’ll live eternally
And I’ll fall on my knees
And I will cry

You are holy, holy, lord god almighty
You are worthy, to receive glory
Honor and power forever
Holy, holy, lord god Almighty
You are worthy
To receive glory
Honor and power forever

Amen, Amen, Amen

Amen
Holy, holy, holy
Holy, holy, holy
Holy, holy, holy

Jesus you are
The angels bow down and say
Holy, holy, holy
All creation cries out
Holy, holy, holy
You’re worthy of all the glory
Forever

Amen

update for April 1, 2, 3

2008-04-03T21:16:00.003-04:00

Okay, I suck real bad, I know!!!!!!!! Please don't be mad at me!

The past few days have been very busy. I started making curtains for the Big Orphanage yesterday. So, needless to say, I've been busy. I find myself very tired at the end of the day.

Visiting the orphanages has been super fun and I dread the day that I leave here and won't get to see them all again. It's makes me very sad. But, I am enjoying the time I do have and I will always remember them. Check out my pics: picasaweb.google.com/laurapk21

I've been doing a lot of reading and listening to music since I have been here and really feel like God has put me in a place away from all my family and friends and every distraction to show me more of Him. It's terribly difficult to be away from Chris and Renee and the rest of the fam but God is continually pressing upon my heart that, although He gave me my family, they do define me and they will never fill all the longings and emptiness of my heart. Even though I already know these things it has been made more real to me lately. I cannot ask my husband to be all for me. He can't. Likewise, he cannot ask me to be all for him. We're not made to be all for each other. The only person who can fill me is my Savior.

In the past several months I have struggled with what God really has for me and what He wants me to do with the rest of my life. There were times I felt that He didn't have anything in mind for me. Just to walk blindly through life? There has to be more! The more I searched the more incomplete and incapable I felt. Why would a God so amazing want anything to do with me? I have nothing to offer Him, I have nothing of value and my imperfections are vast! What was He thinking when He made me? There are so many people with more talent and Godliness than I could ever have. What do I have that's any good? There are better ways He could have spent His time.

At this moment, I finally understand why these thoughts entered my mind and took over. Satan will attack our thoughts and he seems to attack mine daily. He doesn't want any of us to search for what God has for us. He doesn't want any of us to even attempt to impact our world with the name of Jesus Christ. He knows that if he attacks our thoughts there is a potential for us to be defeated. Does God have a plan for me? Yes! Am I to walk blindly through life? Yes! Leaning on Christ! Do I have anything to offer God? Yes! My Heart. What was He thinking when He made me? That He had a purpose for me. Do I have any God-given talents? Yes! Is there anything good in me? Yes, everything that's in Him! Did He waste His time when He made me? No.

I don't know what I have that He wants to use. All I know is that I want to be used by Him. My heart is longing for His will and His plan. I am so tired of allowing Satan to walk into the front door of my life as is if he's welcome and allow him to destroy what God has done in me. I have to move ahead. I can't stay here. Of course it's easier to stay back and hope that whatever God wants isn't uncomfortable but I'm not called to stay. I'm called to go! At some point I have to realize that God loves me regardless of my fat, or my controlling behavior, or my emotional breakdowns, or my temper. I don't have to prove myself to Him like I do the world. He knows me better than anyone and Jesus' blood washed me clean. It doesn't get any better than that.

I don't want to live for other people anymore! I want to live for my God, set free, sold out and with immense passion! I'm ready, Lord. What is it that You have for me?

This is the post for Monday March 31

2008-04-01T09:06:00.003-04:00

Okay, sorry I didn't post last night. It was rainy here and the internet was either SUPER SLOW or down.

It was a fun day. I spent a lot of time at the big orphanage and had a great time. Some pics uploaded last but I am uploading the rest right now. The kids were fun and crazy, as usual.

We all watched Dora and Sesame Street together and I realized, yet again, how smart all these kids are. They may be speaking english very well by the time they come home. It's amazing to hear them and watch them react to everything. They LOVE Dora but they think Sesame street is strange. They will gladly watch anything, though.

Well, there's not much more to say about yesterday. I hope you like the pics. The rest are updating right now. Although it is taking a while. Grrrh. www.picasaweb.google.com/laurapk21

TTYL

Laura

CHURCH

2008-03-30T21:16:00.002-04:00

Today was church day! I think Sundays may be my favorite thing here. I like watching the people, listening to them talk to one another, laugh, sing, and praise Jesus. It's just SUPER COOL! I had hoped to see Sofia's birth mother today but she wasn't at church for some reason. However, we did see her birth father and 3 brothers. So, that was fun and they all love her.

After church we went out to lunch at Le Florville restaurant in Kenscoff. It was a beautiful place with amazing food. I got Lambi Boucane which is smoked conch. It was fantastic. I have never had it before but will gladly eat it again if the opportunity arises.

After lunch we came back here and relaxed. Everyone else had somewhere to be so it was just Sofia and I in the house. It was nice and quiet. We had a lot of fun.

Well, that's about it.

Oh, Beth made no bake cookies and homemade hot chocolate last night. WOWIE WOW was it good.

Enjoy the pics: www.picasaweb.google.com/laurapk21

Fun Times With Sofia

2008-03-29T19:45:00.002-04:00

Sofia was her at 8 am today. I was so excited. We played a lot. She got to talk to Papa and she loved it. We took a nap together, ate a big lunch, played with the lotion, and all kinds of stuff.

I received my FIRST Sofia offered kiss today. It was fantastic. She is so adorable.

Not much more to speak of. Tomorrow is church and Sofia is coming with. She gets to see her birth family again. I love those moments. Her family is wonderful.

Well, Enjoy the few pics I took today! www.picasaweb.google.com/laurapk21

Here is another video from Tuesday

2008-03-29T09:39:00.002-04:00

check out the video of all the kids from Wednesday

2008-03-29T09:25:00.002-04:00

Another Cloudy, Chilly Day on the Mountain

2008-03-28T19:52:00.002-04:00

Today was a little more active day. I waited around Beth and Willem's until 11 am(ish). Rachel and I ran a few errands, which included getting water for the orphanages and something for the sink from the hardware store.

She, then, brought Sofia and I back to the house for a great afternoon of playing, tickling, laughing and most importantly, CUDDLING. Sofia loves to be held and I love holding her.

She reminds me so much of Renee when she was a baby. Their sweet personalities, funny smiles, and all their crazy playfulness. It's quite possible that I have the two most amazing little girls ever. I know Renee isn't so little anymore (she's 14) but she will always be my baby.

I can't wait to complete our family with the homecoming of little Sofia.

I am desperately trying not to think about the day I have to leave here and say goodbye to my darling Sofia as well. I know it's not for another two and a half weeks but the thought still lingers everyday. I try very hard to cherish every moment we have together yet my mind still thinks of the moment I have to say goodbye.

OKAY, I can't think about it anymore. Sofia and I played peek-a-boo and all sorts of things today and I can safely say she wore me out. We hoped to talk Papa today but, I'm sure, his work kept him very busy. I miss his sweet face. Maybe I will get to talk to both Chris and Renee tonight. We'll see!

I am uploading todays pics right now. We were only at the baby orphanage for a few minutes so there are only pics of Tanoushka and, of course, Sofia. www.picasweb.google.com/laurapk21

Have a great night

Relaxing and Chilly Day on the Mountain

2008-03-27T20:35:00.002-04:00

Bonjour -

Jodi a Sofia e mwen despanse anpil tan ansanm.
If I have this right it should say in Creole: "Today Sofia and I spent a lot of time together"

It's been a pretty uneventful day here. I thought I would be going to the orphanage but it turned out that Rachel had some things she needed to do. So, we spent the day at Beth and Willem's. It was nice to not have to do anything but entertain Sofia. We ate cookies and put lotion on and tickled each other. We talked to Papa and Aunt Betsy on Skype. She laughed at Papa's silly faces and listened intently to Aunt Betsy when she was talking to her.

Today was a very cool day here on the Mountain. I wore a jacket for the first time. I had to put jeans and a long-sleeved shirt on Sofia. There's really not much more to say about today. Hopefully tomorrow will be more eventful.

TTYL
Laura

Pics are up: picasaweb.google.com/laurapk21

Another Day at the Orphanage

2008-03-26T18:54:00.005-04:00

Hey there

Today was a good day. Got up, had breakfast, went to the orphanage, came home around 5. The kids are CRAZY! Oh boy, I'm just utterly exhausted each time I come home the orphanage. But I love it. I uploaded pics from today. You may notice that Kenjany has made it in LOTS of pics. Apparently she felt that today was her day to monopolize the photos and clearly, she did. I love her so much. Rachel told me today that Sofia doesn't like to sleep alone so Kenjany sleeps with her every night. They seem to love each other very much. I watched Kimberly, Marley and Dru in true sister action. i love to watch how they take care of each other. It's so sweet. Those girls love kisses. Speaking of kisses, Tanio is a kisser. I'll bet he kissed me 100 times today. And little Tania is so quiet and submissive it's beautiful. She loves her brother and they play, almost exclusively, together. they chase each other and wrestle and laugh and laugh. What a fun day!

Enjoy the pics: picasaweb.google.com/laurapk21

PS I might get to make curtains for the big orphanage while I am here and paint the baby orphanage. I'm real excited.

Sorry it's been a few days since my last post

2008-03-25T19:48:00.005-04:00

Well, I feel like a jerk since I haven't posted in a little while. Things have been crazy here. BUSY BUSY BUSY.

Well, I'll start with Sunday. It was a good day. Church was great, as expected, the weather was beautiful and people were amazing. unfortunately Sofia did not get to come to church with us. We were very sad. Her birth mother was also sad. As soon as she saw us she asked about Sofia. I wanted to cry when we had to tell her that she could not come. Sofia came to us after lunch. She was very tired so she napped a good deal of the time. It was a good day!

Monday - Another busy day. Sofia got eat breakfast with us. (Crepes with banana caramel sauce) SHE LOVED IT!!! We did stop by the baby orphanage to put together a swing and a few toys. We went to the Haiti Historical Museum. It was really great. We learned a lot about the history of Haiti. I'm really glad we went. Rachel took us to the IBESR so that we could see where our paperwork is. She asked someone to check on our paperwork and call her. We haven't heard anything yet. As the day lingered on we began to feel sad that this would be the last day Chris and Renee would see Sofia. They would be going home Tuesday morning. You can't imagine how hard it is to know that you will be leaving your baby in another country not knowing when you will be back for a visit or, more importantly, when she will be home with you. It was heartbreaking to watch Chris and Renee give their final goodbyes. Sofia is our daughter and leaving her behind is beyond any pain we have ever felt. We know the pain of infertility but this is more than that. It's difficult to explain how we feel. If you are reading this and have never been forced to leave your child in someone else's care, in another country, for an indefinite amount of time, and not know when you will see them again, you cannot truly understand the pain and loss. All we ask is that you pray for us on our journey and pray for all the other families that are in their process of bringing their children home.

Tuesday - VERY HARD MORNING! We left Beth and Willem's house around to 6 am to take Chris and Renee to the airport. It was an agonizing drive for me and I'm sure for Chris and Renee as well. It was really hard to say goodbye. I want to be here but being away from the family I adore for 3 weeks is hard. I wanted to be strong because I knew how hard it was for Chris and Renee to leave without me and Sofia but all I wanted to do was sob. I feel incomplete without them near me. I feel alone. I feel unsafe without Chris here. I feel strange without Renee. She is always with me! My emotions are everywhere as I write this. I should move on. (Chris and Renee - I love you and miss you like crazy)
After leaving the airport, Rachel and I ran a few errands. We went to the baby orphanage and to the big orphanage and back to the baby orphanage and back to the big orphanage. Whew! It was a lot.

I am trying to upload pics from Sunday, Monday and Today on the picasa album but I'm not having much success. The internet is doing strange things tonight. It's been raining hard so it's being a little funky. Please check www.picasaweb.google.com/laurapk21 often for updates. Please enjoy!

WOWIE WOW! A Busy Day

2008-03-22T21:12:00.002-04:00

We had a super busy day today! We went sight seeing with Rachel. We left Beth and Willem's around 10:30 am and did not return until 6 pm or so. We travelled up a couple of mountains and then down again, went to Port-au-Prince, to the White House, saw the view from Hotel Montana, and to the orphanage. Renee even got her hair texturized by Rachel. We took several amazing photos today. It's turning out to be easier to upload them to a web album so I'm just going to leave a link for tonight.

http://picasaweb.google.com/laurapk21

Enjoy! BTW, the kids were awesome today!

Sofia

2008-03-21T16:37:00.004-04:00

Again, we did not go to the orphanage today. We stayed at Willem and Beth's to play with Sofia. Enjoy the pics!

Picture upload retry!

2008-03-21T08:11:00.002-04:00

I'm gonna try this again! I couldn't get the pics to upload last night! Apparently they are too big and I need to make them smaller.

Super fun times with Sofia

2008-03-20T20:32:00.004-04:00

Hey there everyone

Well, today was pretty relaxed. We spent the early part of the morning updating the blog and editing video, etc. Rachel dropped Sofia off around 10:30 or 11. She was a little unsure at first but warmed up pretty quickly. She was beautiful today! Her smiles, laughter and excitement were more than we could have asked for. She is completely in love with Chris and can't seem to keep herself out of his arms. It's super sweet. We went to the Baptist Mission for lunch and did a little shopping this afternoon. It was a great time. I think that's about all we have for now please enjoy the pics. BTW, if you would like to see all the pics we've taken up to this point go to our picasa web album. http://picasaweb.google.com/tvchris

All the kids

2008-03-20T13:21:00.002-04:00

Wanted to share a little bit about each of the kids we saw yesterday! Unfortunately we were not at the baby house and didn't get any pics. I'm real sorry!

Kimberly- Her silly personality made us laugh many times yesterday. She clearly enjoys imitating us and the TV. We can definitely see stand-up comedy in her future.

Marley- She is a serious caretaker. There were many times she was seen carrying Sofia around and playing with her. she was also ALWAYS by Dru's side. She loves to be held constantly.

Dru- WOW, the faces! Her eyes are so expressive it makes me laugh every time I look at her.

Kenjany - Little Miss Personality! She and Chris spent the entire afternoon calling each other a baby. She pointed and me and said, "Mama Sofia," at Renee and said, "ser(sister) Sofia," and to Chris, "Papa Sofia baby!"

Tanio- We couldn't believe how much he has come out of his shell. Lots and Lots of smiles. We had never heard him talk as much as he did and of course, he loves to torment Tania.

Tania- The Enforcer- If any of us called for Sofia or any of the other kids and they refused to come, she would make sure they obeyed. She brought Sofia to us countless times. Gotta love her. She has one of the sweetest smiles I have ever seen.

Hope you enjoy!

Here is a video we pasted together of all the kids watching TV.

Our Day at the Orphanage

2008-03-20T12:34:00.004-04:00

Hey there everyone,

Sorry for the delay in updating. We had some computer issues last night. I attempted to update but it didn't work. Oh well, I'm not going to write much. The pictures say it all. It was a good day! FYI, Rachel got a TV for the orphanage and we got the distinct opportunity to witness the excitement of watching Veggie Tales. For some of them, it was for the first time. SUPER FUNNY!!!!! As you will see in the video we took they were very loud during the show! They all yelled several times at the characters, "Don't look at me! Don't look at me!" I was quite possibly one of the funniest things we have ever seen.

Enjoy!

SOOOOOO TIRED

2008-03-18T18:06:00.002-04:00

Well, today has been crazy and exhausting, Rachel brought Sofia to Willem and Beth's house around 3 this afternoon and, as we knew would be the case, she is even more beautiful than before. She tried really hard not to cry when Rachel left and did very well considering she didn't remember us. She still seems so tiny! It's great to watch Renee and Chris with her. They clearly ADORE her!

The problem at this moment is that I am beyond exhausted and can't think clearly. We don't have a real plan for tomorrow so we are excited to see what it may bring.

I think what I will try to do is make it through dinner and go to bed. My body does not like flying and I haven't felt well today. MUST SLEEP!!!

Here are some pics of Sofia from a few minutes ago.

We're in Haiti!

2008-03-18T14:02:00.003-04:00

We've made it to Haiti! We're at Willem and Beth's waiting for Rachel to arrive with Sofia. We're not sure of the game plan but we'll keep you all updated, of course. Not much more to say yet, but we're glad we're here.

Travel Day One: Complete

2008-03-18T00:48:00.002-04:00

Indy to Charlotte, Charlotte to Ft. Lauderdale... we are now within 12 hours of seeing our little girl again. We're a little pooped, a little stinky, but a lot excited. This time we get comfy chairs for the 9 hour layover, and FREE wireless in Ft Lauderdale! Yay! Okay we know these pics are not exciting, but we said we'd blog as much as we could, right?
We'll (hopefully) have much more Tuesday night. Can't wait till then!
Chris

2008-03-10T09:41:00.005-04:00

Well, one week from today and we're on our way! We are very excited but super WORRIED. I can't tell you how rough last week was but I'm hoping this week and the next month will be much better. Thankfully we have some very sweet friends who will love us through everything.(you know who you are- J, B, T and A)

As this point I am begging for prayer as my heart is broken over many things.

Laura

Pics from Haiti

2008-03-05T10:44:00.003-05:00

Hey there everyone-

Wanted to post a link for everyone with pics from our trips to Ayiti last year. We visted in May, September and October.

http://picasaweb.google.com/tvchris

Enjoy!

Welcome

2008-03-04T07:53:00.004-05:00

Welcome everyone-

As you all know from the email you received, we are going to Haiti March 17. We are very excited about the possibility of seeing everyone's dossier move while we are there.

Chris and Renee will be staying one week, however, I will be staying through April 15. My goal is to update this blog daily or at least bi-daily with pics of everyone, video and hopefully paperwork updates.

I can't tell you how excited we are to be visiting again. We have truly been blessed time and time again to be able to do what we are doing.

Attention Adoptive Parents:

Chris, Renee and I will be attempting to communicate using skype while I am there. If you have a skype account and would like for me to call you email me your info and we can try to set it up. It has also been told to me that the orphanage has internet. IF this this true I can try to call you from the Orphanage and you may actually be able to SEE and HEAR your child/ren.

All we ask is that you pray for us on our journey and pray fervently for ALL of our dossiers. Only God can bring our children home to us.

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. - Jeremiah 29:11