Hey all

Wanted to post some pics of the boys clothes I made this weekend. I was able to use a dress shirt and a T-shirt that Chris never wears to make these cute little outfits. Let me know what you think.

Thanks

Without going into great detail things have been interesting around here. It has become more than clear to me that God is working in our lives in ways I've not seen before.

Something left us disheartened and kicking against God Sunday... I knew there was work going on but wanted my own way/picture. I had no idea God would work on me so heavily through the night, while I slept, and not stop all through Monday.

I love how God uses people who love and care us to intervene when He could just, simply, put the "Wammy" on us. We didn't think we could do it but God put people in our paths to encourage and give GODLY counsel. There's nothing like it.

Thank you Lord for your tender guidance and love. Your ways truly are higher and better than my own. I am underserving of the love You show and I am humbled by your generous hand of blessings.

Amen and Amen!!!

Halleujah!

Today has been a great day. Nothing special happened but church was amazing and my sweet family got me a couple GREAT gifts. Thanks to the sweetness of my husband and Renee I got a beautiful skirt from Lane Bryant and a brand new SEWING MACHINE! It is super awesome.

Needless to say, I've been sewing all day! I worked on a patchwork quilt that I started before my old machine died last year. It's going to be very cute. I also made a dress. I am attaching pics of the dress because I need your help.

I need to know whether or not you think I should add things like this to me Etsy Shop. I need input so I figured this was the best place to go! Let me know exactly what you think. I can take it so let me have it! ;-)

Thanks
Laura

I'm struggling today.
That's all.

According to dictionary.net the word AVOID is defined "To quit or evacuate; to withdraw from." I have to say that's exactly what I have been doing. I have been avoiding my blog and the blogs of others.

Why, you ask? Well, it's simple...

I'm tying not to think about ADOPTION! Every time I read about other family's and their adoption adventures I wonder if I'm the only one feeling empty.

While I was in Haiti a few weeks back I was reminded CONSTANTLY of how empty I feel without Sofia! I got the privilege to see two families, that I know personally, arrived in Haiti to take home their children. While I was ecstatic for them; truly Happy and thrilled for them, I had an extremely difficult coming to terms with, "Why NOT me?". At least on of the families was around all but one day of my trip. I can't tell you how hard it was to see the joy in their eyes and hear the excitement in their voices. I was torn.

I wanted to be, visibly, happy for them but each time I allowed myself to forget that Sofia wasn't coming home with me I immediately stopped my joy for them. I recognized how selfish I was being and wanted to be selfless. I don't know why, I just couldn't.

I know all the right ways to think... They ways God would have had me respond. I did try. I don't know if these families knew how broken I was. There was one moment when I had no control and just started to cry. They were so sweet to me but they knew they couldn't console me and they didn't try. I really appreciated that. They understood. That was important to me.

I hate knowing I'm being selfish and not able/willing to stop. It's difficult not to be selfish in these situations. Many of us, adoptive parents, decided to adopt because WE wanted to grow our families. I WANTED... WE WANTED. For us it was selfish; not that we haven't felt God's hand in the entire process. We know He is who's making this happen. But still, we wanted to adopt for US!

I find myself jealous and envious of anyone who is farther along than me and wondering, "what's wrong with me? Do I not deserve Sofia?" And you know, the correct response is there is nothing good in me and I don't deserve her. If Sofia comes home it won't be because I did anything to deserve her. It will be because God chose to give her to us for whatever reason.

I don't say any of this to indicate my trip was bad. It was AMAZING! It was just hard!

So, in closing, I'm sorry for my AVOIDANCE! I guess I'm just trying to work things out in my own heart.

Lord,

I need you!


TTYL,
Laura

Hey All-

I have been back from Haiti since Wednesday. I had a great trip! Sofia is as beautiful as ever. I can't believe how much I fall in love with her each time I see her. She is such a sweetie. If you'd like to check out the pics I took you can go to the following link: http://adoptingsofia.shutterfly.com/ Hope you enjoy!

Also thought you would like to see a little video I took of Sofia the second day there. She's too cute for words!

Enjoy!

Bonjour

I wanted to stop in to tell a quick story about my sweet Sofia!

We went site seeing today and things were going well. We decided to stop at the Baptist Mission for lunch. I ordered pizza for Sofia and a sandwich for myself. When the pizza came Rachel (the Orphanage director) and I noticed that Sofia would NOT eat anything. After a few minutes Rachel says to me, "I think she needs to be changed, she stinks." So I got her out of the highchair and noticed immediately that POO was on the highchair and her dress. "OH NO", I said. I walked her to the bathroom and the attendant pointed us to a table and as soon as I laid her down the attendant said, "OOOOOOHHHHH!" I Iaughed and changed her clothes and cleaned her all up. As we were walking back to the table later I noticed that there was Poo even on the floor that had fallen of her leg. I know, Gross right! As I sat with her on my lap and knew she wasn't feeling well I thought about how long it had been since I had to clean up that kind of mess. I realized again how much I love being a mommy(even when it's gross)!

Thanks heavens for my sweet baby girl!

Have a good Day